The Lifestyle of Procrastination

I am Packed. I am Ready. Time to move to college.

Just one itty bitty problem… I have 82 days until I am out.

Since I decided I will be moving out of state almost immediately after graduating, my family decided to downsize. The big problem is that I am still living with them. We are working out the kinks or at least almost attempting. We are a mess.  Mostly me, I don't understand the concept of organization, even though I have this dream of the perfect laundry room, and a made bed with a huge white fuzzy rug at the foot of it. This idea will stay in my dreams, knowing myself, I would spill something all over the stark fur.

Right now, I have a room full of boxes. In each box, there is one part clothes, one part junk, and one part me not wanting to open it. Consequently, I have been wearing the same jeans for three days, with no real urge for change. Not even care.

I have zero urge to open the wrong box, And prior to boxing up every article of clothing I own, I neglected to label a single one. Yes, I am aware, I should have at least put simple words such as “Need” or, “Don't Need” so that I could minimize the damage but, unfortunately, that did not happen. In fact, as priorities changed and sleep deprivation grew, I became aware of the quantity of rest that I was not receiving. If I could just get those last few minutes of sleep before my alarm goes off, that would be great. And so, I will procrastinate opening the chaotic cardboard cubes that cover my floor.

My family has vanished to do something that is way more important than being home. Now is the time. Laundry. I take off my pants because who needs those? I’ve had them on for a good 72 hrs anyways-- not including my 2 showers where I took them off, showered, looked at them sitting sadly on the floor, and then decided they were probably okay for one more day. Which, I bet, they would have another day in them but, don't tell my mother I said that. In the middle of my procrastination, arose a blatant opportunity. Should I take it?

photo credit: Risky Business

I could just go to my room to eat chocolate and watch a season of  The Umbrella Academy on Netflix. I may not have access to the platform when I move out. These are cognitive financial decisions.  Maybe I could take that nap that has been well deserved after a long day of living and let my blankets protect me from the outside world of responsibility.

The real question is, is my responsibility to do laundry, open boxes, or both? On the other hand, I could order a pizza. Definitely a tastier option. Will my pants grow legs and eat me? Could this piggyback on the trend of $425 Dirty Jeans? What would I do in 50 days when it is 100 degrees outside? Should I cut them off? Will I turn into a Daisy Duke model that makes every guy underestimate their game? Do you have to be blonde to be in that classification? Would I wear makeup? That's a no go.

photo credit: Nordstrom

On the complete opposite end of the spectrum, If DIY  my “new” shorts, would I turn into a meme of one of the people that should not have gone to Walmart dressed like that?

I could even become a hermit for the next 12 weeks-- not letting anyone see me. Life would be great. Me, my laptop, and a mini-fridge filled with all of the groceries I don't have money to buy. Financially being a homebody wouldn't work either.

picture credit: Uncyclopedia

I am an adult. I will do this.

My family is gone, I throw my one pair of jeans is in the washing machine with some t-shirts. Yes, you should separate out the fabric but who has time for that? Okay, you probably do. Don't judge, I suck at laundry. I get it I should have learned that too but the only real life skill I know is how to make Ramen, and how to BS a pop quiz. But unless I have some job as an ACT question writer and a nice maid that lives with me I have a lot to learn. My mother has always done the laundry. Honestly, I’m surprised I found our detergent.

The struggle is real.

What is your biggest procrastination?